Weigh in today: 138.6
Loss for week: .4 lbs.
Total weight loss: 24.4 lbs.
I am NOT happy about this number! On Wednesday I was down to 137...
Ugh. Maybe if I can get things 'moving' again, the number will go back down. I think I may have to go buy something to help in that area. Anyway, it is what it is, and hopefully next week will be better!
Ugh. Has anyone ever done the original 'The Firm' cardio workout? I bought this years ago (Like six, I think) and every once in a while I get ambitious and think I can tackle it. Today was one of those days.
It is a 55 minute workout. I did twenty minutes and collapsed in disgrace.
I am sweating and huffing and puffing like I just ran a marathon! I mean, really. How wimpy! I honestly thought since I'd been walking/running on a regular basis, this workout would be a bit of a challenge but I could surely do it!
I was SO wrong.
I am obviously still in pretty sad shape so my new workout goal is to do 20 minutes of this tape three days a week (on top of my treadmill workout) until I can build up to doing the whole workout twice a week. I desperately need toning anyway, so the weights and cardio combo is a good thing for me to be doing right now.
Hard work, but good. :)
Ugh, indeed...
Remember when I did lovely, hour long, four mile treadmill workouts? Yeah...so do I. Those were the days. :)
For whatever reason, I can't quite DO it anymore! I'm struggling by 20 minutes in, and I don't know why. Today, I totally pushed myself, yet it was all I could do to walk 45 minutes. I thought this was supposed to be getting easier the lighter I got?
Anyway, onto the topic at hand. Sigh. Lately I've been experiencing some, shall we say...digestive issues. I've never been one to be very regular (I can't believe I'm publicly talking about this, what is wrong with me?!?) but since I've added so much fiber to my diet I seem to have slowed things even farther. And the bloat...you have no idea how bloated I constantly feel! Oh, and every once in awhile, for no reason whatsoever, the opposite thing happens and ewwww.
(Do I need to say it? Please tell me you know what I'm implying there!)
So....I saw this commercial for a product called 'Align' and I'm thinking of giving it a whirl. Anyone tried this...or have an alternative product to suggest? Apparently it's pretty expensive (something like forty bucks a month) and it's in capsule form...which I do NOT do AT ALL, so there are two negatives already. (Although, I'm assuming I can open it and dissolve the inside contents into water, so there's that...)
I'm just rambling now. It's totally embarrassment over discussing my digestive woes with you all! Please forgive my disgusting details and share any advice you have for me!
Thank you SO much,
I'm doing a bit better today, thank goodness. Still having that certain 'female' problem, but my mood is definitely lifted compared to yesterday! I've even decided to keep on keepin' on in the diet arena. Why not, right? I can be fat and miserable or skinny and miserable...might as well look good while I cry.
Kidding! See...feeling good enough to joke about it now! :)
My daughter is back with me after a short two day church camp and that helps SO much. What on Earth am I going to do when she grows up and moves out?!? Not going to think about it...
I ate pizza last night (again! I'm obsessed) and I was feeling all self-destructive and planned on pigging out. Of course, this is the ONE time I felt stuffed after only two slices! Guess my body knew better than my rebellious mind. Today? I'm back on track. Special K for breakfast and Lean Cuisine for lunch. Planned snacks are yogurt and an apple. Dinner is a tough one, as I am pretty much OUT of food. I'll cross that bridge later, I guess.
Saw recent pics of me and I still look so bloated and gross. Sigh.
I got my haircut yesterday. Actually, I cut it off myself after I colored it, but couldn't get it even enough myself so off to the salon I went! Twenty bucks just to snip a few stray hairs and taper the ends a bit. Took probably ten minutes. Oh well, guess it's better than walking around with crooked hair. :)
Maybe I even lost a few ounces! Wonder how much hair weighs??
I haven't talked about my down-cycles on this blog, so some of you will have no idea what I mean when I say I'm in one right now. Basically, it's a brief period of depression, usually lasting only a few days but occasionally lasting weeks or a month at a time.
The one I'm in now is mostly caused by yet another month of practically non-stop menstrual bleeding. Ugh. I spot for days and days (even weeks) after my actual period has ended, and the pms/fatigue/moody/yuckiness tends to accompany it as a bonus. Hardcore PMS for weeks. Yay me.
So, my diet and exercise plan is suffering GREATLY. I am so down and grumpy that I don't WANT to take the time to do anything for myself. I simply DO NOT CARE.
If I want pizza, I eat it. Whatever.
If I don't feel like drinking my water, I don't. Workout? Surely you jest.
Sigh. Hopefully it passes soon, but who knows, last month it was almost the entire month.
I'm sorry to be all whiny and pathetic, but I just thought if I'm making this a true diet journal I need to keep it real so I can track what happened later...in case I start gaining now or give up the weight-loss efforts altogether.
Cause that's SO what I feel like doing right now.
Weight this morning: 139 lbs.
Loss for the week: 1 lb.
Total loss: 24 lbs.
Well, as much as I HATE the one pound loss weeks, this week I'll take it and try to learn from it! I was having my time of month this past week and I ate pizza three times, hit the chips a few times, have treated my water intake far too casually, and just generally not focused on my diet on worked out as hard as I should have.
Hopefully, I'll stay on track better this weekend and have more motivation in my workouts this coming week! I'm getting close to the goal so I can't give up now!
I know I haven't been around much this week. I've been struggling with the realization that I've let old habits creep back in, I haven't been getting enough water, and I've been far too lax with the cheats. I tend to fit them into my calorie counts for the day, but chips and ice cream are still junk!
I guess all the times I've eaten badly and still lost are messing with my head, and before I knew it I got cocky. "I can eat chips, no problem!" or "Another ice cream sandwich...no big deal!" I assume because it's only 100-150 calories or I have room in my counts that it's just fine. Sometimes, that is true...remember my dieting philosophy: Nothing is off limits, just eat junk in moderation!
BUT.
Last night I was in bed watching television with my husband and had a hankering for a snack. I was still below calories for the day so I headed downstairs...
And I grabbed a big bag of BBQ chips.
Opened them, ate a couple, and then I realized how much like the 'old days' that was. Munching chips straight out the bag in bed with Hubby. Bad habit, bad for my diet, bad all around!
I quickly took them BACK downstairs and grabbed a string cheese. Not what I really wanted, but a MUCH better choice!
If I really want to lose the rest of this weight and keep it off, I have to treat things like chips and ice cream as the occasional treats they are meant to be, not casual everyday snacks! I'm including 100 calorie packs of chips and cookies as well. They shouldn't be part of my menu every single day.
Back to the good snacks again: apples, string cheese, yogurt, baby carrots, almonds, ect. Back to carrying a water bottle with me everywhere. Back to making a workout a daily priority. I'm only half way there...I need to stop acting like I've already crossed the finish line!
I did a peek weigh-in yesterday and while I'm not up after the tragic eat-alicious weekend I had...I'm not down at all either. At this point, a pound loss for the week would be a massive victory, so that's the goal.
Oh...and I've started piling up the clothes that no longer fit me and having to buy a few new things here and there! I'm back into my size 10's and can even fit a few 8's, although not consistently. My bra's are getting just a bit looser, which is fine by me. I'd like to lose a TAD there...but not too much!
I am being FAR too lax on the weekends. This weekend my daughter was out of town so it was just Hubby and I...and that always leads to food disaster! I had pizza...TWICE. Yep, two nights in a row. I had ice cream...twice. Sunchips...twice. I didn't drink enough water three days in a row. Minimal fruits and veggies. Too many dark chocolate kisses. (That one gets blamed on my pms, though!)
Argh. How many weekends in a row am I going to blow it before I decide to buckle down??
Today I need to get to the grocery, but I'm not sure I'll have the money till tomorrow. If I have good food in the house, I do SO much better. Hubby is picking me up Subway for lunch since the cupboards are bare.
Exercise this weekend wasn't bad, though. Hubby and I stayed active. A nice 2.3 mile walk on Friday, a 6 mile bike ride on Saturday, and yesterday we did some walking in the park while geocaching. It's nice, we've become much more active since I decided to get my butt off the couch every once in a while!
Ugh. Just ate my Subway and had a bag of baked chips with it...now I feel uncomfortably full. Maybe I ate too fast.
Anyway, another Monday wrapped in food regret. Will I learn from it this time?? Who knows.
Weight this morning: 140
That is a loss of 3 lbs this week!
Feels good, especially considering what a bad diet/exercise week it has been, not to mention that I'm premenstrual on top of that.
It's weird. The more I think I screw up, the better I seem to do, and the stricter I am, I don't lose as much. Hmmmm.
Whatever. All I know is that every loss motivates me to keep going...next week it's the 130's!!
You know, this weight loss thing is teaching me so much. I'm learning self control for one thing. Today my daughter and I went to hang out at the Borders at the mall for awhile. In the past that has tended to include coffee and one of their baked goodies...or even a Cinnabon from the mall food court.
Not today. I didn't even get a coffee, for fear it would make me crave the other stuff!
I'm learning perseverance. I can't tell you how many times I've worked out even though I REALLY didn't want to! Of course, there are also a few times I've not wanted to and just DIDN'T, but most of the time I press through and do something, even if it's a short one.
I'm learning patience. I HATE the weeks I lose only one or two pounds. HATE it! It seems like it is going so slow and that I'll lose steam before I ever get to my goal...but I'm moving on anyway. It's coming off, and that is what really matters. I try to remind myself that 'THEY' say that if you do it a pound or two a week, you're more likely to keep it off. Hopefully that is the truth!
I'm learning moderation. I decided at the beginning of this journey I was counting NO food off limits, and I've stuck to that decision. The key is that I've learned to only sample things or stick to a couple times a month. At the graduation party last weekend I had cake -- but it was only half of a small slice. I had fries at Wendy's last week -- but it was only 4 or 5 of Hubby's fries, not an entire order. I had an ice cream sandwich today for a snack -- but it was only a mini sized one worth 110 calories. That is my big diet plan...treats in moderation.
Of course, this totally doesn't include pizza, which I still have on average once a week. Baby steps, people!
I'm learning that I'm capable of doing more than I thought I was. I never thought I could run on the treadmill at all, but I am! Oh, it is mostly only a minute or two at a time, but it is more than I thought possible! I never thought I could stick to a diet this long (the longest before was a month) but here I am two months into it and I'm still doing alright.
Secret confession: I wrote this post because I'm struggling right now and I wanted to encourage myself a bit. It is that lovely time of month when my PMS is kicking in and not only do I want to eat (and eat and eat) but I also want to lay around and be gloomy all day, too. I needed to remind myself of the good things this diet is bringing into my life, so that I get through this next week without gaining ten pounds back!
My diet is NOT perfect and I am NOT doing everything right, but I am much better off now than I was two months ago, and I'm learning that it's alright to struggle as long as I don't give up completely. :)
