Sunday, May 24, 2015

Sunday morning weigh in

Weight last week: 128
Weight this morning: 128.6
Gain of .6 lbs

Yeah, I'm not going to complain about gains while I'm not working out. I was 99% good with my eating this week but didn't work out at all. Gotta get my behind moving when I get down to the last five or so pounds, no doubt about it. The only one to blame here is me! 

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Sunday morning weigh in

Weight last week: 131
Weight this morning: 128
Loss of 3 lbs

Wow! I honestly weighed myself twice because I didn't believe this one. I did NO workouts this week. NONE. I only occasionally logged calories. I went over calories more than once, I'm sure, including just yesterday.

However, I am just finishing up my monthly visit, so perhaps I was holding water weight? Also, I had a salad with chicken breast and fat free cheese FOUR days this week for lunch, a first for me, and apparently my body reacted well to this change! 

So I am FINALLY back in the 120's and I am FINALLY at the twenty pounds gone mark, for this time around, that is. Feels great! I am still lumpy and squishy and right now as I'm sitting here I have a spare tire around my middle, but at least I'm still making progress. Hopefully I'll get around to working out this week and can make some toning and tightening happen. And I'm going to keep eating those salads! :)

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Weigh in and a progress picture

Weight last week: 132
Weight this morning: 131
Loss of 1 pound

Well. It is a loss and I will take it, but dang I've been waiting to get out of the 130's for a VERY long time! My body really wants this to be where I stay, apparently. However, I'm not giving up quite yet. I know I can do better. My workouts are still pathetic in numbers, only one last week. And I had that m&m day, a bit of a cheat day yesterday, and way too much chili and cornbread on Thursday. So most definitely room for improvement.  

Oh, and I thought I'd post a progress pic since I actually have a recent pic of me! I rarely take pictures because I so hate the way I look in them, but last night was my daughter's prom and here's one of us.

Well, here's to another week of not giving up. And maybe a bit of splurging today for Mother's Day! And a big Happy Mother's Day to any mamas reading this! :)

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Some bad, some good

I'm trying not to let this blog sit dormant between weigh-ins so here I am, with a mid-week report. I'm back in the saddle, with a bit of a stumble on Tuesday night due to my first panic/anxiety episode during work. I've been doing better managing these attacks without meds and/or my go-to distraction, m&m's, but since it was during work I was in a hurry to 'fix' myself and couldn't take an anxiety pill because it would effect my m&m's it was. Not a giant amount, but not a small handful either.

Within an hour I also had a break in which I grabbed some dinner and had managed to feel 75% better, enough to have SUCH regret about eating those dang m&ms! I hate that I use them as a crutch! And why on earth does it sometimes work?! Maybe there's a blood sugar component to some of my anxiety attacks, who knows. All I know is, they may have torpedoed yet another week of seeing a loss. 

My workouts haven't evolved in the ways I'd challenged myself last time, either. I'm just an avoider of things I don't want to do! I did hit the treadmill really hard yesterday and it actually felt really good, so if nothing else I'll keep on doing that, it's better than nothing. I'm finding that working in the evenings is a thwarter of my motivation and plan making skills. Not that I couldn't make it work, I totally did the first week of work, but this second week has been different and I'm slacking during the day more. I'll figure it out, I'm sure. Of course, right when I find the right balance I'll be moving to day shift! :)

Oh, one positive note. Even though my losses have not been there recently, my body seems to be changing. I can fit my spring/summer clothes from three years ago, the ones that I started NOT fitting two summers ago and totally couldn't wear at all last summer! I gotta tell you, that felt great when I took a chance and tried them on. Not to mention saving me money, because I came very close to shopping for things, just assuming those wouldn't fit me yet. 

So anyway, lots of setbacks but also slight progress. Enough progress to keep me trying, which is all I can ask right now. Fingers crossed for the weekend, because between our friend being in town with is BBQ truck and going out for Mother's Day, my diet is in trouble! :) 

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Not giving up yet

Just checking in to say that I'm still hanging in there, not giving up like I'd mentioned on weigh in day. (Although I totally made Sunday a massive cheat day, since I was celebrating Mother's Day a week early with my mom and sisters at my favorite Chinese restaurant!) 

I'm at a loss as to what to change about what I'm eating. I added more protein and that made for a good loss the first week I did it, but I've been stalled ever since. I'm mostly under calories each day (except the VERY occasional cheat day) so I don't think I'm eating too much. My exercising could be better, averaging only about 3 days a week, but frankly from past experience I've learned my losses come from diet WAY more than exercising. 

So. What am I doing wrong?? 

In all honesty, I know if I added more workouts it wouldn't hurt, so I really should. But I'm lazy. And I hate to workout! I do love walking in the park with my husband in the evenings, but now I'm working evenings all week so that's not happening. (Maybe I'll wake him up early and go in the mornings?) I know I need to add weight training but OH HOW I HATE THAT. 

You know, now that I mention weight training, it occurs to me that I'd added that in to my routine by this weight the last time around and I never plateaued like this (for weeks!) back then. Hmmmmm. Well, dangit. I think that is something I need to force myself to do. (Insert me whining: But I don't waaaaaaaant to!)

On a different note, the job is going well, just training so far and for the next 5 weeks, and then after that I'll be in a daytime schedule and I think I'll like that better. I feel like overall I'll enjoy the job and it'll be a good fit for me. It already feels good to contribute money to the family for the first time in almost two decades, and I like having something to do other than the usual house stuff, although I hate being forced to give up doing what I want to do when I want to do it. My daughter is learning to pull her weight more around the house, and that's been long overdue, to be honest. (My fault. Being a stay-at-home mom for 16 years, I just did 99% of what needed to be done because it was my JOB, even though I knew I should be training her to be more independent, I wasn't doing enough in that area.)

Well, that's my update for today. Hopefully the changes I mentioned will actually HAPPEN and I'll see a loss this week for the first time in awhile!


Sunday, May 3, 2015

Sunday morning weigh in

Weight last week: 131.8
Weight today: 132
Gain of .2 lbs

Sigh. I haven't been perfect, but I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong to be GAINING weight! I'm feeling so frustrated and ready to give up.