Sunday, September 27, 2009

The cupcake weekend

Wow...I was so incredibly bad this weekend. Really, really bad. Sigh...

Let's start with Friday night. Pizza night. Moving on.

Saturday morning I had half of a glazed donut with my usual breakfast. No biggie. Lunch was half of a Subway 6 inch sub. Doing great. Then I had a baby shower to attend. And it went horribly, horribly wrong.

They had chicken salad on croissants. Soooo good. Had one with a small cube of cheese. Not great, but nothing too scandalous.

But then. I tried a cupcake.

A vanilla cupcake with raspberry filling and cream cheese icing.

And the angel's sang.

I went back for another...and somehow one fell into my purse for later. And yes. I ate it.

THREE cupcakes. And I'm still not done.

We went for burgers later and I was a good dieter and only had one junior hamburger. Until I tried Hubby's swiss/onion/mushroom burger. Oh for goodness sake, it was so stinking good. So....I split one with him. And mooched a bunch of fries, too.

So you'd think after Saturday's disaster I'd do better on Sunday, right?? Nope. So the opposite! Gabriella went home with a friend after church so Hubby wanted to do a date lunch. We chose Applebee's for the 2 for $20 deal. My "plan" was (sigh) to not eat any of the appetizer and only half of my entree.

My plan failed. :(

I tasted the appetizer (boneless buffalo wings) and ended up eating about half. My entree came and I ate, and ate, and ate, till it was about 4/5th's finished. Now before you try and tell me it's no big deal, let me tell you this: the entree alone is over a days worth of calories, has like 50 grams of fat, a TON of sodium, and these numbers don't include the appetizer at all. (I can't even bring myself to look that up.)


So...a dreadful diet weekend. I did end up going on a long, fast walk with Hubby Sunday night at the park so I got a BIT of exercise....but not even close to enough to break even.

Not sure why I was so out of control this weekend. I'm not PMS-ing, I'm not feeling depressed. No excuses whatsoever. Just lost control.

Plan for week: Workouts. Lots of 'em. Get back on plan for eating. Push the water to flush out the bad stuff, especially all the sugar and salt. Re-focus and don't let falling down = quitting.

Here's hoping I can put a stop to the madness!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Saturday Morning Weigh-In

Weight this morning: 123.6
Loss this week: .2 lb

Very small loss this week. Can't believe how close to the goal I was and I didn't get there! Truth is, I'm not on plan as much as I could be. Only doing a couple of workouts a week, not getting enough water, not getting enough fruit and veggies, and adding more 'old' food back into my diet.

I just need to refocus again and for goodness sake: WORKOUT more regularly again! Not worried, I know I'll get there...eventually. :)

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Some of my food changes

The question I've been getting the most these days is: "What do you eat?"

Well, I absolutely don't have it all figured out and I by NO means eat perfectly...quite the contrary! There is very little I consider to be completely off limits to me, I just try to eat the 'bad' things in moderation. But there are a few things I've found along the way the past few months that I think have really helped me.

First, I eat a lot of egg whites and 100% whole wheat English muffins for breakfast. I like the taste of the egg whites only and it shaves a TON of calories off of your meal! The English muffin is around 100-120 calories (much better than say, a bagel) and with the 100% whole wheat I'm getting a great start on my daily fiber total.

Snacks are still a part of my daily routine, I've just changed what I eat for them. Fiber One yogurt is delicious and again...fiber is good. 100 calorie packs of almonds, low-fat string cheese, Fiber Plus bars, a banana, sugar free pudding cups, a bowl of Special K vanilla almond, or my favorite: 100 calorie pack of popcorn! These things are all between only 50 and 150 calories and so much better tasting (to me) than my old snacks of Chips Ahoy or Little Debbies. Honest!

For lunch I usually have a turkey sandwich on light whole grain bread with an apple or banana on the side. Occasionally (like today) I'll have leftovers from dinner or a microwave meal, but the sandwich and fruit combo is my go-to meal.

Dinner is finally becoming more varied lately but for most of the past few months it has been a handful of meals rotated. Lots of boneless, skinless chicken breast being used in different ways: stir fry, sweet and sour chicken, chicken pasta, fajitas, baked with various Mrs. Dash seasonings, BBQ'd. For sides I usually used either whole wheat pasta or brown rice and to this day I ALWAYS fill my plate halfway with a baby green (spinach, romaine, ect) salad. That way, I'm getting my leafy greens and also only leaving half of my plate for the 'real' food. A great way to control portions.

Eating out: Subway has become a regular occurrence around here. Actually, I should just come out and say that we eat it A LOT...usually at least a couple of times a week. I only get the low-cal subs, no cheese or oil, only 6 inch. I usually get a bag of Baked Lays on the side, but it still WAY beats my old meals of burgers, chicken nuggets, and fries and still tastes great. :)

One last thing...I only drink water and black coffee. No soda or fancy coffees whatsoever. I do NOT drink my calories!! Why waste them?? I like to EAT. :)

Now like I said, I was not and AM not perfect at these things. I eat a lot of cheese pizza and baked chips, I even occasionally eat a donut or cookie or McDonalds among other things. But I've learned to like healthier foods and truly the best lesson I've learned along the way is that THE BATTLE IS WON OR LOST AT THE GROCERY STORE!

I hope that this was helpful to someone. I'm sure that there is still a lot I'm doing wrong, but I think for the most part this diet is what is going to work best for me not only in losing the weight, but keeping it off.

Happy eating!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Saturday Morning Weigh-in

Weight this morning: 123.8
Loss this week: 1 lb.

This puts me less than a pound from my goal, which is cool.

I'm still plugging. Just struggling with a deep, deep down cycle for various reasons. It has effected my diet and exercise without a doubt, but thankfully not enough at this point to make the numbers go up. Hopefully, I'll be back to myself, eating right, exercising, and blogging more in no time.

Enjoy the weekend! I think it's the last weekend of summer...

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

What's the point?

Things are crappy and I'm so very tired of the crappiness. It just makes me want to give up. I just don't care. What's the point? That phrase just keeps ringing through my head...what is the point? What difference does anything make?

I am supposed to be at my women's Bible study right now, but I just decided at the last minute to stay home. What's the point, right?

My eating has been pretty decent all day long, but I am so emotionally tired. So sad. So empty. Again, what's the point? Why not just grab something to eat and feel good for a few minutes? A few minutes is better than nothing.

So what if I'm thinner? Did it change any of the crap? Did it fix anything?? So what if I'm still a couple of pounds away from my goal. What difference will those two pounds make? NONE.

I know I suck coming here and having myself a big old pity party, but I am feeling heartbroken and don't feel like hiding it right now. So do you know what I'm doing while I'm typing this? Watching the new season of Biggest Loser.

I so love this show. Oh, I know it is all kinds of jacked up (not enough focus on diet, weight coming off too fast, unrealistic results, ect.) but watching the contestants push through their struggles just inspires me so much. There is a woman this year who literally lost her entire family to a car crash and wow...don't I feel ridiculous in my pity party now!

Oh, I am still feeling crappy, but at least my focus is (somewhat) off of myself for the next hour and a half. That's something, I suppose.

Sorry for this....

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Saturday Morning Weigh-In

Weight this morning: 124.8
Loss this week: 1 lb.

Don't have a clue how I lost a pound, to be perfectly honest. I was really shocked when I stepped on that scale this morning. I had a horrible week, diet wise. I only had one workout in before I got sick and then I was down for three days. I was eating absolutely horribly all week and not getting enough water at all. I spent lots of time in bed and I didn't get enough sleep all week.

However, I am not going to argue with the pound loss. The week ahead my goal shall be to maintain that pound loss! :)

Have a great weekend, all. It's college football day once again!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Caution: whine fest ahead

It's my blog...may I whine? Because I am having a really crappy day. I am sick with the nasty virus that attacked my daughter last week and my husband over the weekend...achy, coughing, headache, tired, plain old yucky. I didn't sleep well at all, despite a couple of doses of NyQuil. My throat hurts SOOO bad and I don't want to talk, but I have to for schooling my kiddo.

And the schooling. Ugh. We switched curriculum this year and while I love MOST of it, there is one problem class. We have the opportunity to switch her into a virtual class instead but I have to decide like yesterday. I hate being put on the spot, especially when it comes to my daughter. I need time to think, process everything, yet because I feel so lousy I just am not focusing.

I just ended up doing the switch, not out of feeling absolutely sure of the decision, but because the stress of trying to decide was making me nuts. I can't even tell you how on the edge I feel lately. And yes, it is most definitely effecting my diet.

Last night I felt so awful that I caved into yet another pizza night. What is WRONG with me?!?! I tend to snack a lot when my throat hurts for some reason, so I was also eating ice cream, Popsicles, peanut butter crackers, mini-cookies, ect. I just don't care when I'm feeling sick.

So between the sickness and the stress I just want to scream. But I can't. Cause it hurts to much.

I shall scream virtually: ARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!

Didn't really help. Dang.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Monday usual

Well, I didn't do well at all this weekend. Not even a little bit. And the scale this morning proves it...I'm up a pound.

I ate pizza twice (again!) once with breadsticks and once it was NOT cheese had a ton of stuff including BACON. Sigh. Pizza is my weakness, as you can tell. I love, love, love it and could probably eat it everyday if need be.

I also had an Egg McMuffin, although I did pull out the egg yolk to help cut down the calories.

Then last night I made spaghetti with meat sauce (which in and of itself wasn't too bad...) and paired it with another of my weaknesses. A big, fat loaf of French bread. I had two not-so-small slices and there is still half a loaf on the counter. I should throw it away, but I really don't want to...

And the cherry on top of my weekend of junk...Oreos. Lots of Oreos. The mini-ones, but still, there were MANY Oreos consumed.

I just completely gave up this weekend. Not sure why. I'm just tired of not eating whatever I want! I'm throwing a fit like a child. Wah.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Saturday Morning Weigh-In

Weight this morning: 125.8
Loss for the week: .6 lb

Small loss again, but seriously...that's okay with me. I'm basically doing maintenance right now and only did 3 half hour workouts this week, so a small loss is great. It tells me my maintenance mode is close to where it needs to ultimately be. Not to mention that EVERYONE keeps saying that the closer to goal you get (less than 3 lbs to go!) the slower it will come off...and it definitely is! :)

My goals this week are to WORK OUT and keep on top of my water intake. Still struggling with both of those things!

Side note: college football today so I'm so excited!! Usually I'd eat myself silly, but today I'm going to at least attempt a bit of control. I'm allowing myself pizza and a couple of breadsticks but nothing chips, sweets, soda, ect. Hopefully I can stick to the plan. :) And GO BUCKEYES!!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

My wimpy diet mentality

Well, my week is going a bit better this week, thank goodness. My eating is on track for the most part and I've done workouts on Monday and Wednesday...although they are shorter than they used to be at least they are something!

I'm almost to the maintenance part of my lifestyle change, so I'm slowly adding in some of the things I cut out of my diet. I've started eating a bit of butter again (actually, I Can't Believe its not Butter spray) and jelly (Simply Fruit) and even had a bit of sour cream on my enchiladas the other night. I'm trying to maintain my mantra of anything in moderation, since it seems to work for me the best.

I'm surprised at how many weight loss bloggers are 100% strict in their diets. Not that I'm judging them mind you, hey, if it works for them that is AWESOME! I just can't live that way. I love food. I love bad food. :) I have pizza all the time. I just don't eat a meat filled slice...cheese only most of the time. I love glazed donuts but I don't eat them often anymore...just maybe once a month and only one. I eat McDonalds occasionally, but I only get a small regular hamburger and a couple of fries. I still haven't let myself eat their breakfast, though. I LOVE McDonalds breakfast and I know that might open the door for too many more after that!

Anyway, my point is that I am trying to train myself to eat the junky food sparingly without depriving myself what I'm craving. It might be a wimpy way to diet, but I'm trying to make it work. The thought of never eating a pizza or a hamburger again just doesn't appeal to me whatsoever. Franky, I would rather be overweight if those are my only two choices. I want to LIVE and ENJOY my life...including what I eat!

On that note though, I must get back into the workouts again and add back in the toning/strength training, too. If I want to enjoy the occasional hamburger, I must have my body burning those fatty calories!! :)

Hope everyone is enjoying their week!