Note to self

So I can't figure out why I sabotage myself so often! Today was going great...brisk 1.4 mile walk in the park with hubby bright and early, low-cal breakfast sandwich for breakfast, remembered my b-complex, went to Subway for lunch and though I was SOOOO tempted by the yummy chocolate-chocolate chip cookies I resisted.

I was feeling on top of it!

Get home with my food and even decided to only eat half my sub and half of my baked chips, and save the rest for a couple of hours later. But then I didn't. And I scarfed it all in like five minutes. Oh, and I also gobbled down a 100 calorie pack of cookies for no apparent reason. Probably about six hundred freaking calories in 15 minutes. And I have zero clues why.

Seriously, WHY?! 

I am now feeling so gross and full. Like, I wish I hadn't have eaten at all. I am taking the time to type this out right now because one day I'll read back over this and I want to tell my future self that IT IS NOT WORTH IT. I feel emotionally sick, physically sick, and just plain disappointed in myself.

So the plan is to not snack today or just grab a yogurt or carrots if i get desperate, cook a healthy-ish dinner (chicken fajitas I think) and for heavens sake use a bit of portion control while eating it, and get another walk/run in of at least a mile, maybe even a mile and a half.

Oh, and do some laundry, which is totally exercise. 

Keep trying, right? Sigh. Keep on trying.   

*Edited to add: I did it! I walked/ran on the treadmill an additional 1.6 miles for a total of 3 miles today. Phew. I feel so much better, not going to lie. :)