Friday, November 16, 2012

Can't find the want in me!

You know what? I am just not feeling this. I want to lose weight, but I don't want to diet. I don't want to exercise. I don't want to make sacrifices or give up snacks or put any sort of effort into this whatsoever. 

It's a problem.

Sigh. I just can't seem to get started. I know that I would eventually get on a roll with this if I would only seriously GET STARTED...but I don't really want to start. 

The further into the week it gets, the more inclined I am to just tell myself I'll start fresh next week. But then the next week comes, and I'm still not feeling it. gets pushed off once again to the next week, and so on. 

I am being a baby. Weak. Just making a lot of excuses. Allowing myself to be lazy and self-indulgent and in the end, I am seriously in denial. Serious question: DO I TRULY EVEN WANT THIS? There is a saying: 'The proof of desire is pursuit.' 

If I am truthful, I know that I am NOT pursuing it, not really, so I have to wonder if I do I truly want it? If I did, I would be trying, at least a little, to make changes. Getting off my behind and putting the work in that I know is necessary. I've done it before, I know how and I've proven that I am capable, so what is the stinking PROBLEM? Ugh.

So anyway, this is me admitting that this was yet another wasted week. All I can do is hope that I find the strength within myself to pursue, seriously pursue, soon.


  1. I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time finding your want-to. That's tough...

    Can Hubby help you with motivation/accountability? Does he still run? If so, would you ever consider doing that with him? I am the LAST person in the world who ever thought she'd be running, but I'm starting to actually ENJOY the runs with my hubby. Not just the time we spend together, but the actual physical activity itself.