I'm just going to say it: My diet has been completely out of control since at least the first of the year...well...even before that actually. I've not even been trying to eat properly. Brownies, chips, and various other crazy-bad snack foods, not to mention whatever food I felt like eating at any given meal, I'm eating it.
OUT. OF. CONTROL.
I haven't weighed in since the first week of January. I just really don't want to know how bad it's gotten. I do know that yesterday my jeans were tight and I had a bit of a muffin-top happening, so yeah, I'm up, just not sure how much. Argh. I don't understand how after almost two years, I completely went off the rails. What happened?
Well, it is partially a winter thing, I guess. I hate winter and I am seriously cooped up in here and eating has become a form of entertainment for me. I'm bored, therefore I eat.
Also, I haven't been sleeping well for quite awhile now, and I think being tired all of the time leads to eating a ton of convenience foods that are also high fat/high cal. The insomnia is also interfering with my will to exercise and my metabolism, too, I'm sure.
Excuses aside, I also love to eat. There, I said it. I loved eating those brownies...they are a pleasure that just can't be duplicated in healthy food! I love eating ooey, gooey, cheesy foods. It isn't anything psychological or deep, I just really enjoy them! I hate exercising. Well, most of the time, that is. Sometimes I love it once I get going, but not lately. Lately I am hurting and sluggish and barely making it through!
So, there you have it, yet another confession that I'm not doing well on the weight front. My weigh in is only days away and we'll see what the damage is then. In the meantime, I'm trying to make adjustments. I've worked out twice this week, hopefully today will be number three. I went overboard yesterday at lunch but tweaked my eating the rest of the day to make up for it. Today I had a nice, big breakfast with the hope of it keeping me from snacking later this afternoon.
The good news is that I know what to do to fix this. The bad news is that re-starting and re-motivating is hard. I recognize that it will be a struggle for the rest of my life to maintain a healthy lifestyle, but catching it before it gets too far out of hand is key to preventing a complete backslide, I think. Right now, I'm just going back to my day by day, meal by meal philosophy and hopefully before I know it I'll be back on track!